the chase and the self doubt

a deer can run at 90km per hour whereas lion can run at 58 kmph max.

despite this large difference in their speeds, lion often is successful in hunting down the deer!

why is that so?

because of self doubt and fear!

when deer runs on seeing the lion, he is almost sure that lion will catch him. this very fear results in the deer constantly looking back again and again to check how much distance is left between him and the lion!

the fear coupled with the habit of looking back repeatedly, results in the drop in deer's speed and wrong decisions resulting in wrong unnatural turns. consequently, lion catches him.

if only deer can control his urge to keep looking back and if only he could trust that his strength lies in its speed, no lion will ever be able to catch a deer.

this is exactly what many of us do and behave!

we often keep looking back into our past so much that the frustrations, worries, regrets and fear slow us down. so much so, that our otherwise very much possible success keeps slipping from our hands.

clocks of time

Einstein who gave us the theory of relativity when once asked "what is time" had replied "time is what clock measures". seemingly simple, this was a profound reply.

another definition of time suggests that time flows because things change or move relative to something or everything. if nothing moves or changes, time would be impossible to be measured.

time therefore is measurement of change against some scale.

an illusion further compounded and muddled by changes inside us.

we have grown and changed a lot since our birth. and how did we measure our "time" age? in years made of specific months made of certain numbers of days on the basis of some cycles disturbed by intermittent "adjustments" and "creeping unforeseen discrepancies"

how interesting that while cycles make us believe and suggest the illusion that the "same" time is repeating/revisiting/recurring again and again the fact is that "if time is measurement of change" we have come and gone very far from any" point of time.

seemingly similar times on cyclic notional calenders are just that.... similar but far from same. at best beautiful excuse to revisit what we don't want to let go.

the essence lies, therefore, in celebrating the essence of the event rather than its exactness.

all calenders are clocks differently engineered by brilliant minds of original thinking societies of independent cultures.

all clocks must be preserved, respected, enjoyed and explored.

Prof Saab's post is very provocative indeed.

bag pack

(self talk) :
punjabi (or for that matter any mother tongue or native language) is, for the children of that soil, a bag pack, a guide map, binoculars, a pair of hunting shoes, a torch, a blank diary, a victorinox and a prayer.....to go out and explore the world.

mother tongue or native language is not a fence to keep us restricted and least so a squeezing one to push us back and deep inside.

punjabi (or any other language) is just a password for an entire culture, history and contours of life. and the beauty is that it opens both ways.

this simple to be happy

if u have not run into problems in your recent life (except small routine ones) it is not because u had money, or that the problems got scared of the money u had. it was because of your habits, your life management. and, in most likelihood, because those were just your fears,insecurities, phobias,imagination gone wild.....therefore, it is a myth that u must have more and more and lot of money to ensure u don't run into problems in life. it is a phobia of fear of pain. unknown, often unbased, exaggerated, illogical

if those giant problems were to actually come someday and in those proportions, no amount of money might be able to help u. u might say that many of the life's difficulties can be taken care of......while u r right if u say that, actual amount u might need might be much less than the unlimited unknown amount u may be slogging lifelong unknowingly sacrificing everything on the way.

it is, therefore, of critical importance that u earn more and spend less. more earning means increasing your value addition and market worth and being paid accordingly without flogging or losing sleep (and smile) over this. less spending means saying no to anything which can be. the extent to increase in earning and extent to decrease in spending can be gauged with the 80/20 thumb rule......80% of the things and tasks and joys can be achieved and done with 20% (or say 40%,50%) of the money.......or 80% of the earning can be increased with 20% efforts....when this 80% comes at 50% cost or more u r stretching at the cost of quality of life.

quality life is all about finding that approximate sweet spot. anything less, and u r underdoing it, underachieving under-utilising yourself. anything more and u r missing the the very purpose for what u were doing it all.

unhappiness is caused because u seek guarantee of permanence of solution instead of solution. permanence is a mirage because life is a dynamic process. only your approach can be permanent. and that may be enough. rest is in god's hands and u should give him that much of space with love and obedience.

if u have not run into problems in your recent life (except small routine ones) it is not because u had money, or that the problems got scared of the money u had. it was because of your habits, your life management. and, in most likelihood, because those were just your fears,insecurities, phobias,imagination gone wild.....therefore, it is a myth that u must have more and more and lot of money to ensure u don't run into problems in life. it is a phobia of fear of pain. unknown, often unbased, exaggerated, illogical

if those giant problems were to actually come someday and in those proportions, no amount of money might be able to help u. u might say that many of the life's difficulties can be taken care of......while u r right if u say that, actual amount u might need might be much less than the unlimited unknown amount u may be slogging lifelong unknowingly sacrificing everything on the way.

it is, therefore, of critical importance that u earn more and spend less. more earning means increasing your value addition and market worth and being paid accordingly without flogging or losing sleep (and smile) over this. less spending means saying no to anything which can be. the extent to increase in earning and extent to decrease in spending can be gauged with the 80/20 thumb rule......80% of the things and tasks and joys can be achieved and done with 20% (or say 40%,50%) of the money.......or 80% of the earning can be increased with 20% efforts....when this 80% comes at 50% cost or more u r stretching at the cost of quality of life.

quality life is all about finding that approximate sweet spot. anything less, and u r underdoing it, underachieving under-utilising yourself. anything more and u r missing the the very purpose for what u were doing it all.

unhappiness is caused because u seek guarantee of permanence of solution instead of solution. permanence is a mirage because life is a dynamic process. only your approach can be permanent. and that may be enough. rest is in god's hands and u should give him that much of space with love and obedience.

let me share a simple example. having a smart phone is ok. but dumping one and coughing out more to upgrade to the one with wireless charging is a brutal example of stretching your life at the cost of quality.

while one can afford it as of now twenty around him may not despite feeling the psychological pressure to catch up

world around us is full of such examples.

to start with, if u begin to scrutinize and curb big ticket expenses, u would have made dramatic qualitative change to your life.

wisdom of Guy Finley

- stress exists because u insist. reality has its own effortless course, and u can either embrace its way or struggle with yours.

- u need no power to flow!!! why push when u can ride?

- when a man abides in the way, his satisfactions are inexhaustible...

- once you understand that nothing real is threatening you, where is your need to anxiously protect yourself?

- once u know that u have already been given an independent, timeless identity, u need never worry again about making urself into someone.

- real power never seeks power.

- if u r seeking power u r under the power of that which has no power, and, regardless of appearances, u will become increasingly powerless.

- a crisis always precedes any real inner advancement.

- a crisis only becomes a breaking point when we fail to use it as a turning point.

- want what life wants....secret of an uncompromising power for effortless living....the only thing u will lose by learning to "want what life wants" is your fear of not being in control.

- unhappy feelings are born out of life failing to conform to your ideas of what you need to be happy.

- make a higher choice when it comes to what u really want from life

- if the want yields pain and anxiety, it is your's and not life's

- pull yourself out of the flood of self wants that promise a future pleasure but only deliver a present pain.

- just sit back, play ur game and enjoy everything.

- we have been trying to succeed with methods which must fail.

- we are tied to whatever we avoid

- any lingering sadness is an unnatural life form kept breathing by the false self's reluctance to let it go.

- if u could have, u would have

- suffering doesn't prove that u r important. what it does prove is u would rather feel like a "someone" who is miserable than be a "no one" who is free, suspended and quietly happy

- a willingness to pass through inner change enables us to see the vastness beyond our present position.

- u don't have to do anything about what tries to disturb u on ur journey. u must not do anything except stay in ur "car"

- u r not here to live upto anyone's expectations, including ur own...

why people are not happy even when wealthy

why people are not happy even when wealthy

quality of life + standard of living = happiness

wealth=backup in months for maintaining standard of living

higher the standard of living=more is the wealth required for maintaining the standard

more the wealth required=more the wealth generating setup required

more the setup= more the risk, more the insecurity/fear, more the involvement/time/effort/energy=lesser the quality of life leading to further loss of happiness

lesser quality of life is attempted to be offset by higher standard of living which in-turn pushes you deeper in the vicious circle and farther from the quality of life

so, there is an optimum level of standard of living which demands just the right effort to maintain without eating into the quality of life.

having achieved the optimum level of "standard of living" in the equation

'quality of life + standard of living = happiness'

only quality of life remains

quality of life obviously has to do something with quality of everything in life and not quantity

otherwise we would be saying "quantity of life" and not "quality of life"

quantity is fixed. quality is a choice.

unhappiness despite being wealthy has got to do more with insecurity of losing the security of buffer wealth than the actual sufficiency of wealth.... it is a mental disorder which can be treated by a good psychologist, teacher or self thought

meet the man who died 7 years ago & is still alive!!!

and that man (or lady) is

the one in the mirror

.....you!

not just you
even myself
and everybody around
died 7 years ago!

not only that
we are all going to die
again
as we complete seven years since then!

well,
science says
that all our body cells
are dying
and getting replaced regularly.

cells of different organs
including skin and bones
are getting replaced
at varying speed.

but all in all
all body
gets replaced
in parts
once every seven years.

what does this tell us?
what implications does this info have?

simple....

why fear death
when we are already dying
when we are already dead
not just once
several times!!!

there is another interesting fact
which can be shared and added here

our brain has the capability
to remember and record
everything you have experienced or heard or seen or read.....
the only limitation is
that you can't recall it all
atleast so easily or voluntarily......
but it is all there
and likely to be there
even when brain cells gets replaced!!!

so our memory
is all that is going to remain
even while our body is getting replaced!!!

not just our own memory
our memories in the memories of others!!!

death
per se
becomes meaningless in light of the above facts.

physically
we are not
the person we were
seven years ago!

whom are we worrying for?

we are nothing
except memories.

we are alive
as long as our memories are alive
if not in our own body
then atleast
in the memories of someone!

stop worrying,
start living!!!