still here

it was an hour past midnight!

four ghosts

were sitting on a big banyan tree

at the start of the dense jungle

just on the outskirts of the village

and discussing

'life and death'

--

"there is death after life

why don't people remember it?"

said the elderly ghost.

-

"there is life before death!

why don't people live it?"

emphasized the wise ghost.

-

"what's the fun?

in my opinion, there is no life. only death all around"

opined the serious ghost!


-

the forth one kept silent

and kept thinking

and finally

when none of the other three asked for his opinion

he quipped himself

"there is nothing called death. it is life all the way!

afterall, we all are still here!"

wings

it was a nice crisp morning
but somehow
the little cute sapling was not happy.
he repeatedly looked at the birds flying around him
then looked down
and got busy thinking something!
to all the tall trees around
that tiny creature's sad look appeared so funny
but he was sad!
even his tiny flowers had not woken up!
--
an elderly banyan tree noticed that something was going on in the child's mind
he bent down
extended his long branch around him
and asked
"why are you sad,my child! what happened?"
the sapling didn't say anything.
he looked at the birds around
and again made a sad face!
"tell me, child, may be i can help you!"
"i want to swing in the high air like these birds...
but i am so small..."
as he said this, a tiny tear rolled down his green cheeks!
the old tree wiped the pearl gently
and said
"you too can rise up there, my dear!"
"how can i? they have got wings!"
"you have got roots!"
hearing this, the tiny tot raised his head
with twinkle in his eyes
"how, uncle?" he asked the old tree
"grow them deep and wide and lift yourself up there"
  

promise

i had been waiting for you

to come and see me...

everyone around me told me that my wish will go waste

like that of millions before me

in the last 1000 years

on this high lonely mountain top...

i had just 5 days

before i would have been no more....

it was so cold

but i braved the ice cold northern winds

whistling past this peak,

i survived without food and water

on just a stray ray of sunshine getting past the dark gloomy clouds above...

i was sure you would come

but every stone around me

laughed at me!

i knew there is no proper pathway upto here from the distant valley below

i knew a fall from this height would have meant a sure painful death

i knew i had nothing to give you in return if you came

i knew you could find millions better than me in the valley below

and in the lands afar!

but i still had an unfound faith that you would come to see me

before i breathed my last!!!

---

now when you have come

everyone around is shocked

in disbelief!

the stones have realised the power of feelings...

the snow has felt the warmth of emotions...

the winds have believed the song of love...

the clouds have seen the realisation of wishes...

the sunshine has remembered the lost ray of hope...

---

thank you for coming, my love!

my life hasn't gone waste...

now i can afford to sleep

but i promise to flower again

even in the autumn

if you promise

to come back again

to see your love blossom again

for you

this far

this high!!!

welcome home

the alarm hasn't gone off

the newspaper hasn't come

neither has the milkman

nor has the bin collector

no morning tea to make

no water to store

no dresses to iron

no shoes to polish

no utensils to clear

no clothes for the machine

no brooming

no mopping

no aastha

no bloomberg

no aajtak of overnight

no to-do list

no deadlines to meet

no calls to take

no waiting customers

no boss to be

no boss to see

---

surrounded by a hundred tall deodars

carpetted by a thousand idle apple trees

few koels and meerkats

wild cats

occasional humming car passing by on the serpentile sleepy road

alone in 'the mamleshwar'

amidst cold winter winds of chindi

waiting for the warmth of the fresh sun

of what is

a monday for the world

but an eternal sunday for me

the morning hasn't started......

welcome home

dear life!

"do you believe in reincarnation?"

"it's cold, isn't it!"

"o yes! freezing!"

"when is the party?"

"tonight!"

"who all are coming"

"all neighbourhood"

"what all has been ordered?"

"hot pizzas and momos and pakoras...."

"and what else?"

"who needs anything else when you and me are there! Ha,Ha......!!!"

"Ha!Ha!Ha!!!!!!!"

both Coke and Fanta had a hearty laugh!

and waited in the fridge

for the wonderful evening ahead!

---

evening came

and in came the guests

kids, elderly, ladies and gents...

all dressed superbly for the celebrations!

everyone was so happy and excited!

hundred lights were lit

and music was turned on!

in came the piping hot pizzas

followed by momos

and spicy pakoras...

but everyone was still missing something

"where is the coke?"

"where is the fanta?"

yeah! give me the chilled coke

and me fanta!!!

me too!!

we too!!!

coke and fanta in the fridge felt like kings!!!

desperately needed and immensely respected and loved!

cans of coke and fanta were taken out of the fridge

and taken in trays

amidst the party

and loud cheers!!!

it was so intoxicating for both heroes!!!

everyone rushed to have one

rapid fire opening of cans after cans sounded like 21 gun salute!

"Cheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeers!"

and over a hundred lips kissed their cans and started gulping the first heavenly sip!!!

"Wonderrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrfullllllllllllllll!"

everyone announced in chorus!

it was ecstatic for the duo!!!

and then everyone got busy.

a few ladies started discussing dresses

and some about their husbands

gents in the corner were discussing business

while those on the table were talking politics

the kids were dancing

while the elderly near the fireplace were talking philosophy

"do u believe in re-incarnation?" asked one elderly gentleman with golden locks!

"yeah, i do!" another replied.

coke and fanta were enjoying everything except the philosophical talk of the senior guys!

they neither liked fire nor the talk of philosophy!

the party kept going on

till the crescendo!!!

and then the party got over.

everyone said bye and started to leave.

all put down the empty cans

they were not excited about them anymore!

suddenly the cans felt like unwanted, ignored and immaterial!

it was heart-breaking!

it was too real to be true.

they just couldn't believe the turn of their luck

all in just over an hour!

"this is so unfair!"

"u can't treat us like this!" they yelled

but nobody seemed to listen!

they all left.

lights were turned off one by one

and music stopped abruptly.

the catering boy collected the cans

and...

and...

and...

threw them in the waste-bin

and closed the lid!

"it's so dark inside!"

"and so hot!"

saying this both went silent

and then the empty can asked his buddy

"do you believe in reincarnation?"

sugar cube

a man frantically searched the net for 3 days

to get the real email id of god.

finally, he got it!

he had his mail text ready.

he opened the 'compose' box,

pasted his message

and clicked on "sent".

god was online.

he opened the mail and read

"dear god,

i am very annoyed with you.

you threw me inside the cup of your universe

in the hot boiling coffee of life

like a sugar cube!

and mercilessly

stirred me violently

and randomly

and unpredictably

and non-stop

with the spoon of events and shocks!

consequently

i got dissolved

and finished

much before i had expected to stay on the shelf of life.

what was more shocking was that when i got completely dissolved

u stopped stirring and put aside the spoon of events!

were all storms in the cup of life created only for me?

i was used to sweaten

somebody's  coffee.

i wanted to live

but i have vanished without a trace!"

---

god smiled

and typed back

"my dear child,

it was not somebody's coffee

it was my cup of coffee!

i hand picked you for me.

you have not vanished

i sipped u, i drank you

now u are inside every pore of mine

intoxicating and charging me

looking thru my eyes

breathing thru me

living with me!!!"

coins in the pocket!

a man started meditating

on one leg

without eating

standing in ice cold water

in dead winter

in the open sky

at the setting of the sun!

minutes turned into an hour

hour passed after another!

his body started turning blue

his breaths became erratic

his nerve started sinking

but he withheld his vow!

---

despite hating such brazen acts,

god appeared.

just to save a life.

---

"Make the wish you want to!" He said

"give me money, o almighty!"

god waved his hand in thin air and produced

a gold pitcher full of gold coins.

"happy?" god asked

"somewhat. but i want more, o lord! what u have given will finish in a year"

god smiled and again waved his hand in air and produced

an elepant made of gold!

"enough, child?"

"huge! but this will finish in 10 years!"

god smiled much broader this time, closed his eyes

and produced a mountain of gold!

"hope this will be more than enough, son!"

"surely, god! surely! but pardon me, this too will finish in 100 years!"

---

"how much do you really want, child?" God asked curiously!

"enough to last for a lifetime!"

"then you should have first checked the length of your life, son!"

"oh yes, o yes. tell me that, God! tell me how long will i live?"

the man started sweating in that freezing cold!

---

god checked his diary

and then replied

"you will finish earlier than the coins in your pocket, son!"

too busy

suddenly rattan appeared in front of me

with folded hands and radiant face

and asked for keys of the new vehicle to be transported to rampur showroom

125 kms from shimla towards china.

---

vindi was sitting right in front of me

boasting about his daring mischieves and misadventures

---

95 year old sandhu uncle (grandfather of my earlier landlord)

so politely welcomed me into the house

when i went there to hand over the monthly rental

---

rajesh impressed me with his answers

and i immediately recommended him to my c.e.o.

to be recruited as finance executive

---

jerry barked at me when i went to himanshu's house

---

little did i realise that rattan was about to meet with an accident in 5 hours!

little did i realise that vindi's foot would have to be amputated 1 month after i last met him!

little did i realise that sandhu uncle would breathe his last that night!

little did i realise that rajesh would accidently kill someone and be jailed for life!

little did i realise that jerry would breathe his last by the next sunday!

---

we are always too busy to realize

that we may not be realizing

the must-be-realized!

disprin

year : 2040

place : punjab university canteen, chandigarh

present : a group of p.g. students

topic : how to counter stress

"i patch up with the problem and surrender" rohit, the flamboyant thinker of the class shot the first salvo! 

"my stress doesn't go till i take disprin" added sarita, "the doc"

"i use an ointment and get some relief" sarita's tail savita joined in

"i ask someone to massage my head instead" tina said, shruggin her shoulders

"i take a drink" thakur, the hardy boy, quipped

"i prefer coffee" gurjeet, the naturopath of the group, declared

"i listen to ghazals" said saloni, the voice of the class

"i try to work out a solution to the cause of the stress" pali, the practical announced

" i leave it alone, it leaves me alone soon" sukhi, the statesman stated

"i try some sleep" deepa, "the sleeper" of the class yawned!

"i do yoga" said yoginder, the yogi!

what do you do rudra?

suddenly 

heartbeats stopped

eyes turned

ears stood up

even students on the adjacent tables turned their heads

those playing table tennis stopped

timeout was taken in the chess game

everyone wanted to hear rudra's answer

rudra, true to her habit, was unconcerned by the attention

and uttered

"nothing is stressful, but a situation.............. i have philosophy.......my philosophy is my disprin"

for next 60 seconds nobody knew what had happened!!!

bankruptcy

the year 2025 AD

class : IIIA

---

"what is the meaning of bankruptcy?" the teacher asked.

out of 30 students in the class only one hand shot up

that of little rudra!

teacher got nervous

she feared the creature's unpredictable answer!

"anyone else?" teacher provoked the class

no other hand popped up

either out of tiny rudra's fear

or for not actually knowing the answer.

"ok, rudra, tell me - what do you mean by bankruptcy?"

"teacher,

when you become a rich man from being a poor,

and then become richer and richer and richer,

but still, all you can think about is

what to buy with that money

all you can think about is gadgets and assets

and can't think beyond buying property or clothes or accessories

can't think beyond cars or shopping malls or toys

can't think anything except money and stuff money can buy

can't think anything except bank balance

when financial insecurity simply doesn't go away

and there seems nothing left in life except money and material

...that is bankruptcy

bankruptcy of ideas

thankyou!"

after saying it all in one breath

rudra sat down

with the entire class with mouth open in awe!

teacher took out her handkerchief and wiped the droplets from her forehead.

difficulty in being good to the bad

a fakir was walking on a narrow muddy lane

while moving from one cluster of villages to the next.

a goat and a dog were following him.

the fakir was famous and respected far and wide

for his radical views.

on the way a group of people was coming from the opposite direction.

they recognised the fakir and bowed to him.

"blessed to meet you, holy soul!" they said in a chorus

the fakir smiled, blessed them and was about to move forward alongwith his dog and goat

when a young man in group uttered in an unsettled hurried voice

"can you help me in my dilemma, o noble soul!"

the fakir stopped and looked back

"tell me, child!"

"in private, o blessed soul!"

the fakir took him aside under the big banyan tree.

but the dog and goat followed their master.

"now tell me, child!"

"i have a lot of difficulty in dealing with people.

everyone around seems so unreasonable

and wrong

and bully

and unjust

and cunning

and stupid

and harsh

and unconcerned....

i get deeply hurt by them.

it is so difficult to deal with them

without either taking on them or swallowing my own pride!

i feel like leaving the place.

i am deeply dejected and feel out of place

please tell me how should i deal with these difficult people?"

the fakir smiled

looked at the goat and the dog standing around in rapt attention

and said

"son! these two creatures are my long time companions.

they accompany me wherever i go

but even after so many years of co-existence

neither the dog became goat or goat became me or me became a goat or dog!

the dog still loves what he does

the goat still does what she loves

and i still live the way i should.

none of us can be what we are not!

still, somehow we know we can't be but together.

same is your situation, my child!

open your eyes and recognise the real souls you are surrounded with

and you will realise their helplessness!

it is not the question of difficulty in being good to the bad

it is the question of difficulty in seeing the God in the bad!"

saying this,

the fakir started to walk.....

....and the dog and the goat followed him!

the lost smile!

once

a king was sad.

his sadness continued for days...

and then months...

the king was a reasonable man

he knew he should pick himself and his spirit up

but somehow he couldn't.

everything and anything he tried

failed.

he grew more sad.

there was no specific reason behind his sadness

but he found no specific reason to be happy as well!

daily routine-laughing and merry-making seemed hollow...

he started slipping into melancholy

and with him

his queens and courtiers and servants went sad...

days started to drag...

till it became unbearable...

one early morning

before the sunrise

the king dressed up like an ordinary man

gave his guards the slip

took his horse

and left his kingdom in search of happiness...

his horse kept running non-stop till the dusk

.....by that time both had come quite far

the sun had gone down the western edge

and night was approaching fast.

king saw a small hut at a distance.

he tied his horse to a tree outside the hut and

called for anybody inside.

a sage came out

he instantly recognised the king despite the disguise

he, at once, understood the entire matter without the king uttering a single word!

the sage fed the kings's horse water and grass

and took the king inside.

he gave king fruit to eat as dinner

for that was the only thing he had...

king had the best dinner of his life!

after the dinner

king became sad again...

and asked the sage for help.

"we will talk about it in the morning, O King!" the sage replied

"lets sleep for now."

the sage went to sleep

but the king's eyes were wide open

looking at the stars outside the hut's window

remembering his queens and children and beloved people!

after some time king slipped into deep sleep

it seemed ages since he had slept like that!

---

when the first earstern wind of the approaching morning caressed his head without the crown

the night was saying goodbye but the morning was yet to whisper in!

the cusp was magical!

the king opened his eyes

it was still dark around

but his inside seemed filled with light...

he kept lying in the bed with his eyes wide open...

it seemed like ages had passed in between.

and then

the king started to smile

big

effortlessly

for no rhyme or reason!

his smile remained intact for several seconds

and then minutes....

he kept on smiling for what seemed like ages

he had no reason to smile

but he kept smiling

without trying to know the reason

without trying to look for logic

without counting his sorrows and difficulties

without thinking anything....

anything...

something inside him wanted to smile

big and selflessly and endlessly

he just smiled and kept enjoying the smile....

gradually, his inside was filled with the radiance

when his inside was full of joy

and was about to brim over

he closed his eyes

but his smile stayed on!

he was feeling so light

and happy!

---

after, what again seemed like ages,

he reopened his eyes

and rested the smile slowly

every pore in his existance was rejouvenated!

---

he sat up

said his prayer

and looked for the sage.

the sage was not there!!!

the king was jolted!!!

---

and this broke his dream!

he found himself still in his royal palace

in his royal bed!

---

he realised that he had been dreaming!

thinking this

he smiled again

big

efforlessly

without trying to know the reason

without trying to look for logic

without counting his sorrows and difficulties

without thinking anything....

anything...!!!

"life is much more..." he whispered! 

availability and affordability of hell

2500 years ago

Buddha pointed towards "desire" as the root cause of "sorrow".

the truth hasn't changed much in these 2500 years

except for one word....

"desire"

the word "desire" in the above statement has been replaced by "consumption"

Today, "consumption" is the root cause of "sorrow".

we consume what we outrightly don't need

we consume what we don't really need

we consume more than we need

we consume costlier and higher than we need

we consume what we already have

we consume what is not good for us

....our lives are littered with criminal wastage!

resulting into unending unjustified misery!

---

Sorrow, which used to be a supply-side despair

has turned into a demand-side curse!

availability and affordability of hell

has become an irresistable invitation

in the absence of a real agenda!

---

give me a chance!

a man trekked all the way up

to the top of the mountain

and shouted on top of his voice

"if by chance

i get a chance

i'll be successful.....!

i want to be successful

pleeeeeeeeeeeease help me with a chance around!!!"

---

his shriek echoed in the valley below

"if by chance

i SEE a chance

i'll be successful....!

i want to be successful

pleeeeeeeeeeeease help me SEE the chance around!!!" 

---

the man was condused to hear what he heard!

"what's the matter son?"  the lone tree on the mountain top whispered...

"my echo is not exactly what i said! why?" asked the perplexed man

"this is a valley of enlightenment, son!" the tree replied

"it want sto tell u that

the unlucky souls are not short of luck

they just have weak or cursed eyesight!

they are unable to see the chance as a chance!

chances are always around.

it is only that we don't recognise a chance in the chance!

rather, there is nothing called chance....

mind has the ability to convert anything or everything into a chance!"

---

"don't ask for a chance, son

ask for better eyesight

or better still

ask for better mindsight

to recognise the chances 

all around

Me and my 11 friends

i want to do it

i always wanted to do it

i asked my friends for their opinion

my self doubt said

"you can't"

my ego said

"you shouldn't"

my self-control said

"don't"

my self-worth said

"can you?"

my self-conscience said

"you may"

my self-consciousness said

"you haven't ever"

my self-image said

"you just can't"

my self-esteem said

"you should have already"

my self-respect said

"atleast try, now!"

my self-confidence said

"you can"

my character said

"you must"

I thanked them all and said

"come, let's start!"

the grand picnic called life!

life is like an onion...

seems bitter...

yet so necessary for the curry of joy!

But there is more to it which symbolises life.

Keep it peeling layer after layer in search of the real thing

and you will find nothing!

The layers are the real thing!

This the reason I call my life a grand picnic!

Layer after layer, year after year, achievement after achievement

we keep searching for the real thing

and we find nothing

which completes our search,

quenches our thirst

and pacifies our quest!

Why?

The layers are the real thing....!

The journey is the destination.

We all have already arrived!

There is no more destinations to arrive at! Period.

Only joys to enjoy!

Lots of things to do on this grand picnic!

The following is my list of joys which keep me occupied 25 hours of the day (and night)!

* movies

= if I were to view all the great movies of the world cinema I would be needing a few hundred more lives!

* food

= if god is surely there on this earth, it is definitely there in the food!

* valleys and mountains and nature

= if I were to spend just one night at every Dak Bungalow on this planet I will be requiring a few hundred lives more!

* blogs, netsearch, net surf

= enough food for my mind for a few hundred lives in the virtual world

* radio, internet radio, you-tube, podcasts, television

= who has the time to die!

* books, audiobooks, e-books

= enough for a few hundred lives more! By that time there would be enough new ones for a few hundred lives more!

* twitpic, photography, photopainting

= unquenchable thirst for the thousand eyes of my mind!

* music, songs and ghazals

= enough to keep me intoxicated for a thousand lives!

* stock markets

= the best game I love even to lose!

Who has the time to "die"!

Who has the time to "live"!!

when there is so limited time to picnic!!!

back to the life's shelf

Today

when I was helping my wife in the kitchen,

while washing a hard plastic plate

it slipped from my hand and fell!

My instant flash reaction was

"It's gonna break!!!"

My instant reaction was based on my experience.

I had broken a few in this way in the past!

But this time, surprisingly, it didn't break.

I was relieved as well as amazed!

what could be the reason!

The height from which it had fallen was same.

It was hard plastic and should have got broken the way others before her had!

Perhaps the reason was that it had fallen not perpendicularly to the ground but in a slanting position.

It didn't fall vertically on its edge

but at an angle!

The impact was largely reduced.

the angle surely saved the plate!

I picked up the "lucky" plate, washed it and put it back on the shelf.

Same thing happens to we humans.

we often slip from the hands of good fortune and fall down.

Many of us often get broken!

Rather, all of us get broken once in a while (if not often)!

What breaks us is not the height from which we fall or slip!

What breaks us is the "angle" with which we fall!

Majority of us, majority of the time fall perpendicular to the life's harsh realities

on the edge of our fragile mental strength and sensitivities!

The solution?

whenever we fall (fortunately or unfortunately?)

lets make it a point to fall at an angle, like the plate

lets try to make the fall light!

lets absorb it on our vast resilience reservoir

rather than on our egdes!

For those of us

who have unfortunately got broken in the hard falls

stand up

pick a quick fix

apply it on self

and get back to the life's shelf after a nice wash!

7anti-habits for highly ineffective stressed people

Anti-Habit 1.

Don't be Proactive (Least be reactive)

= Get out of the race. It's life.

----------------------------------------

Anti-Habit 2.

Neither from the end, nor from the beginning.......don't start it! Don't "do" it, let it happen!

= Get this clutter jargon out of your head. Life is not an assignment. Live it!

----------------------------------------

Anti-Habit 3.

Put the first thing and the second thing and all things till the last thing......last!

= Only life comes first!

----------------------------------------

Anti-Habit 4.

Don't just think win-win, throw the win out of winDOW!

= Life became hell when win became more important than life. There is more life in "losing" than winning! Recognise it!

----------------------------------------

Anti-Habit 5.

Never mind whether you can understand before being understood. Just love - everyone and everything will be understood!

= Life has got consumed in the understand-understood fight.

----------------------------------------

Anti-Habit 6.

If Synergy isn't there on its own, it doesn't want to be there.

= Synergy can't be created, it comes...naturally. Live as it comes!

----------------------------------------

Anti-Habit 7.

Don't sharpen the saw any more, it is bleeding you and everyone!

= Just light a candle in the dark lives!

Who will decide...?

Who will decide whether you will be happy or not?

will it be decided by the salt in your soup? 

or the sugar in your tea?

the money in your wallet? 

or the balance in your account?

the brand of your shoe? 

or the cost of your shirt?

the mobile in your hand?

or the signal in your mobile?

Will your happiness be disturbed by 

the lift that is not working?

the a.c. that is not cooling?

the geyser that is not heating?

the pen that is not writing?

the knife that is not cutting?

the lid that is not opening?

the dish that is too hot?

the cola that is too cold?

What has the permission to blow off your fuse?

the train which is late?

the bus which went early?

the rickshaw which is too slow?

the auto which is too fast?

the flight which landed late due to air congestion?

Is your happiness controlled by?

the dog who barked at you?

the cat which crossed your road?

the mouse which appeared in your cupboard?

the cow which has blocked your path?

the crow which cawed when you were about to leave home?

the fly which fell into your cup of tea?

What or whom will your happiness depend on?

the pots in the road?

the spots on your face?

the news in the newspaper?

the direction of the stock market?

the views of your peers?

Is your happiness in the hands of 

the policeman who bullied you?

the friend who ditched you?

the teacher who slapped you?

the peer who sneered at you?

the bank teller who made you wait?

the railway ticket checker who looked at you as if you were a thief?

your boss who is rude to you?

Is your happiness dependent on whether you are

appreciated or criticised

applauded or booed,

welcomed or shooed,

left alone or disturbed,

recognised or ignored, 

approved or disapproved,

accepted or rejected, 

agreed to or disagreed,

permitted or blocked,

Is your happiness outside you?

or within you?

Who will decided that you are happy?

you?

or everyone and everything around you?

Whatever happens on the canvas of your life,

Keep your happiness out of the picture!

Everytime, every second something happens in your life

just ask yourself

"Who will decide whether you will be happy?"

And then, say it loud and clear in your mind

"It is me, only me. Period"

"Its all in your head, youngman!"

Many years ago I went to Kalpa (in the heart of Himalayas, in District of Kinnaur in HP) in a Bolero.

Kalpa is situated at an altitude of 2759 m from the sea level, on the old Hindustan Tibet Road at a distance of 260 km from Shimla.

Kalpa seems so high up from the Satluj below that if we were to throw a stone from Kalpa into Satluj, it would take a few minutes to reach it!

Kalpa is not too far from China border.

Right in front of Kalpa is the mighty 6050 meter high Kinner Kailash, legendary winter home of Shiva.

When you are in Kalpa you are nearer to God and away from the world.

In those days there were no mobile signals there, very less traffic.

Just occasional army helicoptors passing from below (we were at mountain top) taking men and essential material towards China border posts.

After dropping me at Kalpa, the driver of our company came back to Shimla by bus, leaving me and the Bolero behind.

I was to stay there for a week on official assignment and had foolishly agreed to drive the Bolero back myself.

Little did I realise that I had no experience in driving the wide and powerful Bolero in the deadly high roads.

Anyhow, I got busy in my work.

The next day, it started raining...................... and continued for the rest of my stay there.

I was thrilled at majestic view all around including the heavenly Kinner Kailash.

Little did I realise that this would cause flash floods in the Satluj which will damage the already narrow national highway at crucial bend points.

It is a treacherous road which chills your spine while you negotiate the narrow road with mighty Satluj river deep on one side and huge wall of the mountains on the other.



And then came the news.

The highways had indeed been damaged at more than a dozen points.

The consolation - small vehicles like jeep, cars can cross the "remaining" road, albeit very carefully!

That "remaining" width of the road was just equal to the width of the jeep.

There was no way my driver could come back to drive me back.

I couldn't postpone my return beyond 1-2 days.

Rain had no agenda to stop in the next foreseeable future!

"This is a regular thing here" I was told by a local.

In front of me stood the grand question

"Can I drive back the Bolero myself"

"Should I"

"Can I"

Should I"

"Can I"

"Will I"

The self-discussion made the fear grow in me.

It was real situation in front of me!

I delayed my return for one more day.

But next day I had to return.

And the next day came exactly in a day.

I packed my luggage, put it in the UV, tanked up the diesel and started slowly out of Kalpa

.....towards my destination

.....and perhaps my destiny!

Just 8kms from Kalpa, below Peo, I stopped my Bolero at the first point of broken stretch road.

Half of the road had slipped below in the Satluj due to incessant rains.

"nikal jaaegii", advised an outlooker, who assured me that the remaining road width was enough for my Bolero.

I felt like killing him.

On one side was a 1000 feet drop into the Satluj and on the other side was great wall of the mountain.

Had it been just me, I would have walked through.

I had to drive the beast machine with me.

One wrong move,

one over or under pressing of the accelerator or clutch

one worng selection of the gear

one hesitation

and the jeep will fall down

with me!

I kept standing till their was a traffic jam behind me.

A elderly local bus driver came to me and looked into my eyes.

He was perhaps the only one who could empathise with me in that my situation.

He understood my dilemma in a flash.

He just came close to me and softly whispered those magical words in my ears which were to change my life for ever!

"The Bolero doesn't know that the road is broken.

Neither does it know that there is Satluj on the other side.

Its all in your head, youngman!"

My eyes went wide open on hearing what he just said.

He was right.

It was all in my head.

I recollected what he said

"The Bolero doesn't know that the road is broken.

Neither does it know that there is Satluj on the other side.

Its all in your head, youngman!"

I sat in the UV,

Carefully, selected the 1st gear,

judged the width of the road,

held the steering firmly

concentrated calmly

said my prayers

and started moving it.

It was full 40-50 meters stretch

and I cleared it!!!

It was like a new life!

It was as if I had conquered Mt.Everest.

I stopped my Bolero, got down and looked behind.

The driver was waving at me.

I waved back, my eyes full of thanks and gratitude

for the biggest lesson of my life he had just given me

"The Bolero doesn't know that the road is broken.

Neither does it know that there is Satluj on the other side.

Its all in your head, youngman!"

I sat in the Bolero again

and this time started driving with a strange burst of confidence.

On my way back from Kalpa to Powari to Karchcham to Tapri to Wangtu to Bhawanagar to Rampur on my way back to Shimla

I came across half a dozen dangerous spots where fear of death could sniff life out of you.

I crossed all those stretches with those magical words

"The Bolero doesn't know that the road is broken.

Neither does it know that there is Satluj on the other side.

Its all in your head, youngman!"

Have you come across situations in life (including trading) when

your brain tells you what to do

your gut feeling tells you what should be done

your experience tells you it won't be wrong if you do it

yet you find yourself unable to "pull the trigger"

unable to take that first step

unable to act!

Why?

Fear!!!

Fear of failure.

Fear of losing.

Fear of the pain.

Fear of death.

This fear creates doubt

and where there is doubt, there is surrender!

All this used to happen with me every time.

It still happens at times.

But all I do to evaporate those doubts & fears

is to play that music in my ear

"The Bolero doesn't know that the road is broken.

Neither does it know that there is Satluj on the other side.

Its all in your head, youngman!"

Patience (favourite quotes)

* Results of patience are exponential.

* Patience is power. (Chinese Proverb)

* Genius is nothing but a great aptitude for patience.  (George-Louis de Buffon)

* Patience is also a form of action. (Auguste Rodin)

* Experience has taught me this, that we undo ourselves by impatience. (Michel de Montaigne)

* All human wisdom is summed up in two words - wait and hope. (Alexander Dumas)

* He that can have patience, can have what he will. (Benjamin Franklin)

* To know how to wait is the great secret of success.

* Everything comes if a man would only wait.

* It is not necessary for all men to be great in action. The greatest and sublimest power is often simple patience.

* How poor are they who have not patience! (Shakespeare)

* Patience lies at the root of all powers as well as of all pleasures!

* He that is patient will persevere.

* There is no great achievement that is not the result of patient working and waiting!

* Endurance is the crowning quality and patience all the passions of great hearts. (James Russell Lowell)

* To bear is to conquer our fate!

* Patience is bitter but its fruit is sweet! (Aristotle)

* There is no road too long to the man who advances deliberately and without undue haste; no honours too distant to the man who prepares himself for them with patience!

* Patience is the courage of the conqueror!

* The key to everything is patience. You get the chicken by hatching the egg,not by smashing it. (Arnold H. Glasgow)

* One minute of patience, ten years of peace! (Greek Proverb)

* In the struggle between the stone and the water, in time, the water wins. (Chinese proverb)

* Patience will achieve more than the force. (Edmund Burke)

Enemies (favourite quotations)

- Am I not destroying my enemies when I make friends of them? (Abraham Lincoln)

- If you want to make peace, you don’t talk to your friends. You talk to your enemies.(Moshe Davan)

- You can discover what your enemy fears most by observing the means he uses to
frighten you. (Eric Hoffer)

- Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake. (Napolean Bonaparte)

- Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much. (Oscar Wilde)

- Listen to your enemy, for God is talking. (Jewish Proverb)

- Love is the only force capable of transforming an enemy into friend. (Martin Luther
King, Jr. )

- He who seeks vengeance must dig two graves; one for his enemy and one ofr himself. (Chinese proverb)

- Do good to your friends to keep then, to your enemies to win them. (Benjamin Franklin)

- When there is no enemy within, the enemies outside cannot hurt you. (African proverb)

- I hate admitting that my enemies have a point. (Salman Rushdie)

- A merely fallen enemy may rise again, but the reconciled one is truly vanquished. (Friedrich von Schiller)

- Speak well of your enemies…you made them. (Anonymous)

- I ask you to judge me by the enemies I have made. (Franklin D. Roosevelt)

- Enemies make you stronger, allies make you weaker. (Frank Herbert)

- If we could read the secret history of our enemies, we would find in each man’s life
sorrow and suffering enough to disarm all hostility. (H.W.Longfellow)

- Let your enemies be disarmed by the gentleness of your manner, but at the same time let
them feel the steadiness of your resentment. (Lord Chesterfield)

- The supreme excellence is not to win a hundred victories in a hundred battles. The
supreme excellence is to subdue the armies of your enemies without even having to
fight them. (Lao Tzu)

Photography (favourite quotes)

* If u don't know painting, opt for photography.

* A photograph is the shortest movie in the world with the photographer as its director.

* Photography is the finest diplomacy.

* A photograph can be a visual delight, ornamental, statement, report, record, inspirational, abstract art, ilustrative, insightful...

* Paintings are created, photographs are received.

* In painting, we give, in photography we receive.

* What camera would it be if you did not know what camera it was?

* A photograph is a still documentary.

* My job is to click. Interpretation I leave to u.

* Camera taught me the art of silence!

* I prefer zoom photography where I can afford to be at a sufficient distance from the subject for absolutely natural shot.

* I use mobile camera to practice composition which often gets hijacked by technology of sophisticated cameras.

* The best part of a portrait is the expressive and all-revealing eyes.

* If the photograph has done its job, technicals don't really matter!

* A photographer is a salesperson who sells his concept.

* What I lack in equipment, I make up in ability.

* Stare silently at a photograph for undisturbed 15 seconds. If the picture starts communicating to ur mind, it's a good photograph.

* A photograph can be taken in 100 ways. Photographer's composition makes the difference!

* Photography is the art of seeing!

* To see something in something, u need to focus ur mind!

* A photograph is not a complete truth.It is only partial truth; and hence very dangerous!

* Every photographer, in effect, is a photojournalist.

* Photographying is living!

* Choose the angle and composition which shows good thing good and bad thing bad!

* Each photograph reveals the photographer a bit more!

* Photo-therapy!!!

* "look at this from my point-of-view"

* A photograph is photographer's p.o.v.

* A photograph is photograher's signature!

* Photography helps people to see. (Berenice Abbott)

* Your mind is like a live camera that is constantly taking picture. (David Acuna)

* Not everyone trusts paintings but people believe photographs. (Ansel Adams)

* 12 significant photographs in any one year is a good crop! (Ansel Adams)

* A true photograph need not be explained, nor can it be contained in words. (Ansel Adams)

* A good photograph is knowing where to stand. (Ansel Adams)

* A photograph is usually looked at - seldom looked into. (Ansel Adams)

* Photograph - A picture painted by the sun without instruction in art. (Ambrose Bierce)

* No place is boring, if you've had a good night's sleep and have a pocket full of unexposed film. (Robert Adams)

* When u photograph people in colour, u photograph their clothes, but when u photograph people in B&W, u photograph their souls. (Ted Grant)

* There are always 2 people in every picture - the photographer and the viewer! (Ansel Adams)

* The camera can photograph thought. (Dirk Bogarde)

* I think the best pictures are often on the edges of any situation...& nothing is as interesting as photographing the edges. (William Albert Allard)

* A photograph is memory in the raw. (Carrie Latet)

* Photographers are more of hunters than cooks! (Henri Cartier Bresson)

* All photos are accurate.None of them is the truth. (Richard Avedon)

* A picture is worth a thousand words. (Anonymous)

* When people ask what equipment I use - I tell them my eyes. (Anonymous)

* A photograph reveals the photographer. (Anonymous)

* Amateur talks about the equipment. Professionals talk about photos. (Anonymous)

* Photograph is one of the most universal languages around and u don't have to say a word! (Anonymous)

* If you have to explain a good photograph, it isn't that good!

* Every time someone tells me how sharp my photos are, I assume that it isn't a very interesting photograph. It it was, they would have more to say. (Anonymous)

* One picture can change your life. (Movie - City of God)

* I hate photos. They speak too much! (Anonymous)

* Write with a sound and think with an image. (Aristotle)

* You can't make a great musician or a great photographer if the magic isn't there. (Eve Arnold)

* The virtue of the camera is not the power it has to transoform the photographer into an artist, but the impulse it gives him to keep on looking. (Brooks Atkinson)

* "Does it interest the eye, excite the brain, move the mind to reflection, & involve the heart?" (Julian Barnes - on a good photograph)

* The photographic image...is a message without a code - Roland Barthes

* Too many photographers try too hard. They try to lift photography into the realm of art, because they have an inferiority complex about their craft. You and I would see more interesting photograph if they would stop worrying, and instead, apply horse-sense to the problem of recording the look & feel of their own era. (Jessie Tarbox Beats)

* You can observe a lot by just watching. (Yogi Berra)

* A good photograph has a direct simplicity without recourse to dazzling technique. (Israelis Bidermanas)

* My native language is Dutch, my second is photography. (Lieve Blanckaert)

* There are two types of photographers. Those who take pictures and those who make pictures. (Camille Bonzani)

* Never take away your subject's dignity. (Bernie Boston)

* If you want to photograph a man spinning, give some thought to why he spins. (Margaret Bourke)

* With all the arguments and discussions about the vietnam war, what did the visual image do? It ended the war! (Cornell Capa)

* In portrait I am looking for the silence in somebody. (Henri Cartier)

* Your first 10000 photographs are your worst. (Henri Cartier)

* As photojournalists we supply information to a world that is overwhelmed with pre-occupations and full of people who need the company of images...we pass judgement on what we see, and this involves an enormous responsibility. (Henri Cartier)

* To see a colour is a delight for the eye but to see in B&W is a delight for the soul. (AndriClaudwell)

* When u start showing ur work to others, the purity of the art diminshes. You do pure art for yourself. (Evan Clarke)

* My aim in photography is always to convey a mood & not to impart local information. (Alvin Langdon Coburn)

* A true photographer is as rare as a true poet or a true painter. (Jean Cocteau)

* A photographer must be free of his psychic & emotional baggage. (Allan Douglas)

* Beauty is in the eye of the cheque book holder. (Dean Collins)

* Everything has it's beauty, but not everyone sees it. (Confucius)

* We see nothing till we truely understand it. (John Constable)

* I don't watcha photo...I read it. (Massimo Conti)

* A painter works with colour as the medium, a photographer works with light. (Carlotta M)

* I love taking pictures because it's an instant art. (Dave Davidson)

* The absolute worst thing a person can say about your picture is, "That's nice." It's the kiss of death. (Joe Di Maggio)

* Go for the gut. Make a strong statement. Challenge your viewers' intellect & sensitivities. When poeple love it or people hate it, then you know that it works. (Joe DiMaggio)

* Some of the best photography I have ever seen has come from the eyes, heart and souls of amateur photographers. They do it for all the right reasons and none of the wrong ones. (Joe DiMaggio)

* If you take photographs, don't speak, don't write, don't analyse yourself, and don't answer any questions. (Robert Doisnear)

* Unless a picture shocks, it's nothing. (Marcel Duchamp)

* What we do during our working hours determines what we have: what we do in our leisure hours determines what we are. (George Eastman)

* To me technique is not that important. (Albert Eisenstaedt)

* I always prefer photographing in available light so you get the natural modulations of the face. It makes a more real, alive & flattering portrait. (Albert Eisensteadt)

* I seldom think when I take a picture. My eyes and fingures react-click.But first, it's most important to decide the angle at which your photograph is to be taken. (Albert Eisenstaedt)

* In a photograph a person's eyes tell much, sometimes they tell all. (Alfred Eisenstaedt)

* Yes I sold buttons to earn a living. But I took pictures to keep on living. (Alfred Eisenstaedt)

* Once the amateur's naive approach and humble willingness to learn fades away, the creative spirit of good photography dies with it. Every professional should remain always in his heart an amateur. (Alfred Eisenstaedt)

* Keep it simple. (Alfred Eisenstaedt)

* Every artist was first an amateur. (Ralph Waldo Emerson)

* I think what makes a picture is a moment that is completely spontaneous and natural and unaffected by the photographer. (Bill Eppridge)

* The whole point of taking pictures is so that u don't have to explain things with words. (Elliot Erwitt)

* I want pictures that are emotional. (Elliot Erwitt)

* Photography is not a race or a competition. Don't make a noise about it. It is soulful silent music for the soul. Just enjoy it in private domain.

* Good photograph is in effect, a fine observation. (Elliot Erwitt)

* My absolute conviction is that if you are working reasonably well the only important thing is to keep shooting. (Elliot Erwitt)

* It's how u organise, what u see into a picture, that's important. (Elliot Erwitt)

* The camera cannot lie but it can be an accessory to untruth. (Harold Evans)

* If you want to make good photographs, a camera has to be a second nature to you. Devoting too much attention to technical decisions can interfere with ur creative process. (Robert Farber)

* The things under ur nose invariably look good when blown up really big. (Andreas Feininger)

* Always study a 3D subject with one eye closed. (Andreas Feininger)

* Before you shoot an irresistable subject, mute all your senses except sight to find out how much is left for the camera to record. (Andreas F.)

* What matters is not what u photograph, but why and how u photograph it. (Andreas F.)

* A technically perfect photograph can be the world's most boring picture. (Andreas F.)

* When I photograph, I always look for people who are absorbed in something. (Susie Fitzhugh)

* I would much rathermve people than shock them. There's only a value to 'shock' if you've something worth being shocking about. (Julian Flynn)

* You should make photographs with your heart, mind, eyes and soul. The capture device is simply there (to help you). (Bill Frakes)

* If my photograph leaves an image on the viewer's mind - something has been accomplished. (Robert Frank)

* The truth and beauty are often to be found lurking in apparently vulger and stereotyped phenomena. I am also aware that the smaller the object the more one is happy to gaze upon it. (Tamotsu Fuji)

* When u photograph a face, you photograph the soul behind it. (Jean Luc Godard)

* Be careful when choosing your teacher. If you have real talent you might not need one. (Misha Gordon)

* Alway shoot from the shadow side. (Ted Grant)

* The most important legs u have is your legs. (Ernst Haas)

* I am not interested in shooting new things. I am interested in seeing things new. (Ernst Haas)

* The camera doesn't make a bit of difference. All of them can record what u r seeing. But you HAVE to see. (Ernst Haas)

* ...man learns while he sees amd what he learns influences what he sees. (Edward Hall)

* Head of the photgrapher is more important than his camera. (Philippe Halsman)

* The immortal photographers will be straight forward photographers, those who do not rely on tricks or special techniques. (Philippe H.)

* The word "photography" can be interpreted as "writing with light" or "drawing with light". (Philippe H.)

* It is more often the good psychologist rather than the good photographer who makes good portraits. (Philippe H.)

* I'm only in it for the exposure. (Eric Hands)

* A photograph is a collision between a person with a camera and reality. (Charles Harbutt)

* Photographs should be symbolic rather than descriptive. (Eric Hartmann)

* Don't shoot what it looks like. Shoot what it feels like. (David Alan Harvey)

* "Quite pictures" are like crossword puzzles. But some people don't like crossword puzzles because it forces them to think. (James Lalropni Keivom)

* A photograph draws its beauty from the truth with which it is marked. For this very reason I refuse all tricks of the trade & professional virtuosity which could make me betray my Canon. As soon as I find a subject which interests me, I leave it to the lens to record truthfully. (Andre Kertesz)

* I have to shoot three cassettes of films a day, even when not ‘photographing’, in order to keep the eye in practice. (Josef Koudelka)

* My work is about making candy for the eyes. It’s about grabbing your attention. (David La Chapelle)

* The camera is an instrument that teaches people how to see without a camera. (Dorothea Lange)

* Pick a theme and work it to exhaustion…the subject must be something you truly love or truly hate. (Dorothea Lange)

* If a photograph stirs the emotions in atleast one person, that makes it art. This includes the person who clicked the shutter. (Henri A.Lundh)

* The camera should be like the notebook of a trained reporter. (Stefan Lorant)

* The only thing that makes a good photo is if you like the photo. (Andrew Maclean)

*Giving a camera to Diane Arbus is like putting a live grenade in the hands of a child. (Norman Mailer)

*Finding the subject is the hardest part. The subject gives you the best idea of how to make a photograph. So I just wait for something to happen. (Mary Ellen Mark)

*I photograph things I want to look at a little longer. (Gunnie Moberg)

*Don’t shoot until you feel it in your gut. (Lisetle Model)

*Generally speaking, I’m not one to advocate photographic rules, but I do think it helps to off the lens cap. (Catherine Jo Morgan)

* The longer I’ve been photographing, the more I want to simplify my tools and materials. That way I can better concentrate on the images I’m trying to make. (Catherine Jo Morgan)

*Never see nothing, always see something. (Walter De Mulder)

*There is no dividing line between adventure and photography. (Chris Noble)

*Wait a minute – I’m a journalist…I don’t take sides, I take pictures. (Nick Nolte)

*Photography is an art richer in surprise than painting. (Andre Breton)

*Photography is a literature of light. (Moses Oliver)

*Let the pictures do the talking. (Ken Oosterbroek)

*Being a photographer is making people look at what I want them to look at. (Ruth Orkin)

*In black & white u suggest, in colour you state. Much can be implied by suggestion, but statement demands certainty…absolute certainty. (Paul Outer)

*36 satisfactory exposures on a roll means a photographer is not trying anything new. (Freeman Patterson)

* An effective photograph is a good photograph. (Irving Penn)

*Photography for me is an exciting & personal way of reacting to and commenting on one’s environment & I feel that it is perhaps a great pity that more people don’t consider it as a medium of self-expression. (Tony Ray Jones)

*I make images for the hard of hearing. (Dominic Rouse)

*A room hung with pictures is a room hung with thoughts. (Sir Joshua Reynolds)

*The most successful photographs are not those that required the most trouble. (Carlo Rim)

*Your equipment doesn’t affect the quality of your image. The less time & effort you spend worrying about your equipment the more time and effort you can spend creating great images. (Ken Rockwell)

*Memory demands an image. (Bertrand Russel)

*I don’t want anyone to appreciate the light or the palette of tones. I want my pictures to inform, to provide discussion. (Sebastiao Salgado)

*I hate nothing more than sugary photographs with tricks, poses and effects. So allow me to be hionest. (August Sander)

*The still must tease with the promise of a story the viewer of it itches to be told. (Cindy Sherman)

*I believe the photographs should be simple technically, and easy to look at. They shouldn’t be directed at other photographers. (Lord Snowdon)

*The camera is just a box. What’s important is what is in your mind. (Bill Snyder)

* A photograph that brings news of some unsuspected zone of misery cannot make dent in public opinion unless there is an appropriate context of feeling and attitude. (Susan Sontag)

* All photographs are memento mori. To take a photograph is to participate in another person’s mortality, vulnerability, mutability. (Susan S.)

* It seems positively unnatural to travel without taking a camera along…The very activity of taking pictures is soothing, and assuages general feelings of disorientation that are likely to be exacerbated by travel. (Susan S.)

* The painter constructs, the photographer discloses. (Susan S.)

* Travel becomes a strategy for accumulating photographs. (Susan S.)

* The camera is a wonderful tool, but 9/10th of people using it are simply button pushers who let off their cameras as one lets off a firework. (D.A.Spencer)

* Photography to me is therapeutic. It is a way for me to release and express emotion. A good day taking pictures is equivalent to a good visit to an expensive therapist. (Tom Sperduto)

*Once you really commence to see things, then u really commence to feel things. (Edward Steichen)

*If I were to teach, I would’t teach a course in photography. I’d teach a course called ‘What Matters’. (Ralph Steiner)

* When a portrait evokes a feeling, then you’ve got something. Technique isn’t really important. What I want is a believable moment. (Bern Stern)

* Women especially ask me to take their pictures, because they think I’ll make them beautiful . (Bern Stern)

* I shutter to think how many people are underexposed & lacking depth in this field. (Rick Steves)

*Truth is the objective of the documentary attitude. (Roy Stryker)

* I am not interested in adjectives. I am only interested in pictures. (Roy Stryker)

* To speak technically, photography is the art of writing with light. But if I want to think about it more philosophically, I can say that photography is the art of writing with time. When u capture an image u capture not only piece of space, you also capture a piece of time. (Gerardo Suter)

* It isn’t what a picture is of, it is what it is about. (John Szarkowski)

* The question is not what you look at, but what u see. (Henry Thoreau)

* We must look for a long time before we can see. (Henry Thoreau)

* …amateurs worry about equipment, professionals worry about money, masters worry about light, I just take pictures…(Vernon Trent)

* God makes the pictures, I just take them. (Ed H.Urqhardt)

* Photography is the love affair with life. (Burk Uzzle)

* Technical perfection is not the goal of photography. (Ellis Vener)

* The big challenge to photographers is to be able to tell the story with only the image. (Philip Wayner)

* You have a million options with equipment to distract you. I tell my students to simplify their equipment. (Brett Weston)

*I see no reason for recording the obvious.(Edward Weston)

*Let the subject generate its own photographs. Become a camera. (Minor White)

*I am always mentally photographing everything as practice. (Minor White)

*All photographs are self-portrait.(Minor White)

*One should not only photograph things for what they are but for what else they are. (Minor White)

* Often while travelling with a camera we arrive just as the sun slips over the horizon of a moment, too late to expose film, only time enough to expose our hearts.(Minor White)

* Advice to photographers : learn technique, then forget it.(John R. Whiting)

*I really believe there are things nobody would see if I didn’t photograph them. (Diane Arbus)